Illustration for article titled 3 From Hell: Review (spoilers)

I’m going to just come out and say it bluntly but this 3rd installment into Rob Zombies Trilogy was really bad, like I was getting frustrated with it bad. I was tempted to shut it off but I stuck it out. Spoilers ahead because it was nothing but predictable and not really worth watching. The film starts off where the Devils Rejects left off which was nice to see, then dives straight into a guided media frenzy coverage of them Natural Born Killers/Bonnie and Clyde style. So right off the bat they kill off my favorite character which was Captain Spaulding, he has a quick interview with some journalist, giving a really decent monologue and never see him again, so my interest started to wane immediately. They move onto Otis showing how he escaped custody, here we had a decent setup for some action, despite you asking why the hell such a notorious killer is even out on a chain gang digging a ditch and not in Max Security isolation. It was a found footage gag that could have worked well but they fade to black and did a post aftermath shot (remember this because it happens all the time), so we don’t get to see what went down other than his Cousin Foxworth (Spauldings half brother) showing up (who is beyond annoying and tries to act like Otis) and springing him free as well as Danny Trejo’s cameo being cut short (he died). So we have 2 plots running here with a subplot. 1. Otis has to free Baby from prison 2. leave the country and go to Mexico. So when we get around to Baby she is putting her best Harley Quinn impression on but in a way overbearing manner, just acting random and weird with all the prison scenes. An over use of really close up angles with the camera constantly moving like the camera man was drunk swaying side to side at times. This is where the slow motion starts and man does it get old, when music starts in this movie expect slow motion to start and with the camera unsteady was like a bad music video being played this happens multiple times. All the supporting characters are morons and beyond stupid, when Otis holds the Prison Warden and wife + 2 friends hostage for Baby’s release these dumbasses try to reason with them, are you shitting me? What ever the scenario is, you are going to die, so might as well fight back and to the death if it comes to it (my logic). Hell one of the guys even said ‘you can’t reason with them’, literally 5-10 mins after they were trying to reason with them- *facepalm. It’s dark and like the middle of the night and some random guy shows up at the door dressed as a clown to do a show? I don’t know, I threw my hands up like what the hell is going on I could not figure out the point of the clown sequence, was this suppose to be funny? Because it wasn’t funny. There is a scene with Baby that had a good setup, (revenge from a Guard she hurt) 2 inmates are going to jump her they circled each other with insults to build tension and BAM! Close up jump cuts I counted like 30, you can’t see anything just grunting, slashing and yelling in 1 second cuts over and over it was terrible. Guard comes back and you only see the aftermath... I slouch further in my chair, “laaaammmmmeeee”. The warden sneaks Baby out and Otis and company kill the hostages, they decide there’s too much heat so they go to some small town in Mexico to hide where they seem to run into a lot of Americans living there and working, their English is spectacular for rural Mexico. They do throw some 8th grade Spanish around for authenticity though, no need to be too accurate now. Trejo’s son hears about them and wants revenge (subplot twist) brings his gang of killers who aren’t good at their jobs to the little town. Another few slow motion scenes happen with music again. Shooting a bow -> slo mo cool song, carrying a gun -> slo mo cool song... shooting the bow again -> slo mo but less song, fucks sake man we get it already. They setup another what would be cool show down scene a machete fight with Otis and ‘Henchman 006' and it was destroyed by 79 (I counted) close up jump cuts with some shaky cam for the cherry on top of this shit sunday. Slashing stabbing and grunting... aftermath shot. The gang boss procrastinates when he has two of them dead to rights and starts monologuing like some cheesy comic book villain and then proceeds to lose. What a let down to what could have been a cool ending. They live and survive to terrorize another day. I really don’t know what else to say other than to ask what happened? Was this a budget thing and the film was rushed? The over use of slow motion, the shoddy camera work, constant close ups and the one thing I hate the most in a film, Jump Cuts. Jump Cuts = lazy film making. Let the fucking scene breath, give the actors some room to work for crying out loud. Cheesy forced dialogue with Otis and his Brother adding “mother fucker” after everything they say was getting beyond annoying. In the previous films we had reason to fear these characters and relate to their almost heroic turn from really bad to well still really bad but against the system and in this they’ve become laughable second rate comic villains... ugh, I’m done. Just disappointing.


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